Engelsk
___________________________________________________________________
Can you name the 5 great kings that have brought happiness into peoples lives? Answer: DrinKing,SmoKing, LicKing,SucKing&FucKing. Have a nice evening:)
___________________________________________________________________
Dear friend,do u take me 2 be ur lawful textmate, 2 have & 2 hold 4 rich qutes & corny jokes intext meetering & in poor signals till low battery do us apart?!?!
___________________________________________________________________
<3Like a fallen angel u fell into my life.U made me =) when things weren't going right.If kisses were water,I'd send u the sea coz thats how much u mean to me<3
___________________________________________________________________
Life can be hard & not always fun. But as night brings dark, mornin brings sun. When life gets tough & no1 seems 2 care,Give me a call coz I'll always b there!
___________________________________________________________________
I have tears on my face beacuse I hurt u.I wish I could hold you, touch you, feel you.My heart is bleeding,can't you see?Your the only one for me!
___________________________________________________________________
Doctor to you: like everyone else, you have a left and a right brain. But in the left one theres nothing right, and in the right one, theres nothing left..
___________________________________________________________________
God made the rivers, God made the lakes, God made you, but we all do mistakes!
___________________________________________________________________
Never have sex with a policewoman she will say STOP! Never have
sex with a nurse she will say NEXT!. Always have sex with a teacher
she will say REPEAT 5 times.
___________________________________________________________________
1 day a 70 year old man told his penis: We were born together, seen
life together, had lot of fun together, then why did u die before
me?
___________________________________________________________________
Ur spcial2me. I dnt wnt anthng bad2hapn2u. Want u2alwys bsafe. Bt
i cnt alwys b bsyd u. So pls b vry carefl evrtym u 0( ..) swing
on _ ( .) trees! (,)(")(")
___________________________________________________________________
For the world, you're someone, but for someone you're the world.
___________________________________________________________________
Sex is like Nokia (CONNECTING PEOPLE), Like Nike (JUST DO IT), Like
Pepsi (ASK FOR MORE), Like Cutty Shark (SO SIMPLE), Like Fanta (SHARE
THE FUN)
___________________________________________________________________
hNJOH OS W,I 3SV37d 3W d73H Hurry up and Crack the code!!!! Turn
the mobile upside down!!
___________________________________________________________________
If a big fat man comes into your bedroom at night and puts you in
a bag - don´t worry... I told Santa I wanted you're for x-mas...
___________________________________________________________________
I want this message 2 put a :) on your face. Want u 2 remind that
u are in my mind all the time. This message was sent 2 u just because
u is special to me
___________________________________________________________________
I must have been born under a lucky star to have a friend like you
are.
___________________________________________________________________
Why do men get smarter during sex? Because they're plugged in to
a genius!!!
___________________________________________________________________
U are special, u are smart, u are funny and u can fart. U are special
to me, together we are free. Free to do..
___________________________________________________________________
As we go on, we remember all the times we had together, and as our
lives change, -to whatever, we will still be friends forever...
___________________________________________________________________
Good night my friend, close your eyes, may your dreams be sweet,
listen to the angels song of sleep, soon we'll meet again, but until
then: I love u my friend!
___________________________________________________________________
If the stars could see how bright U are, they would be too shy to
shine, hey look, the stars don't shine tonight!
___________________________________________________________________
When I am not texting you it does not mean i forgot about you i
was just giving u time 2 miss me `cos i want you 2 miss me the way
i am missing you
___________________________________________________________________
Don`t walk in front of me, I may not follow. Don`t walk behind me,
I may not lead. Walk beside me, and just be my friend..
___________________________________________________________________
The first time I saw you I saw love"The first time you touched
me I felt love" and after all this time you`re still the one
I love.
___________________________________________________________________
So little angel, slept so tight. I'll dream about you all through
the night..In my dreams you always are cause you are my little shining
star!!!
___________________________________________________________________
There were three ships, the silvership, the goldship, and the most
valuable of them all:the ship that sails between you and me, the
friendship! I hope it sails forever!
___________________________________________________________________
I feel hungry-but I can't eat, I feel tired-but I can't sleep. the
only thing I can do is thinking about you!
___________________________________________________________________
The fleezy cloud may kiss the sky, the rose may kiss the butterfly,
the morning dew gives kisses so tight, but you my friend I kiss
good night..
___________________________________________________________________
Loving you is the second best thing I have done. Finding you is
the first..
___________________________________________________________________
Forgetting me: It's up to you. Forgetting you: I'll never do!
___________________________________________________________________
Dream sweet even though there's no dream sweeter than you. Have
a nice night, make tomorrow bright by opening your beautiful eyes,
good night...
___________________________________________________________________
Do you believe in love at first sight, or do I have to walk by you
again?
___________________________________________________________________
Do you have a map? I just got lost in your eyes.
___________________________________________________________________
I miss my teddy bear... Would you sleep with me?
___________________________________________________________________
@>->- This rose is to remind you how much I care about you.
___________________________________________________________________
Cotton Candy? Nope! Chocolate syrup? Nah! Let me see... How about
sugar? Hmmm... Nope! Damn! Still can't find anything as sweet as
you!
___________________________________________________________________
I asked God for a flower, he gave me a garden. I asked for a tree,
he gave me a forest. I asked for a river, he gave me an ocean. I
asked for a friend, and he gave me YOU!
___________________________________________________________________
May the world hug and may the wind carry a voice telling you there
are a friend, sitting in another corner of the world thinking about
you today.
___________________________________________________________________
Roses are red violets are blue I was made perfect what the hell
happend to you?
___________________________________________________________________
To play with the mafia is the same as likking a pussy. One miss
and you are in deep shit
___________________________________________________________________
Answering machine: Hi! I am probably home. I'm just avoiding someone
I don't like. Leave me a message, and if I don't call back, it's
you.
___________________________________________________________________
The police r looking 4 a murder suspect described as sexy, beautiful,
intelligent, funny + great in bed.
- U r safe but where the fuck am I going to hide??
___________________________________________________________________
I've seen angels in the sky,I've seen snow fall in July.I have seen
things you only imagine to see or do,but I still haven't seen anything
uglyer than you!
___________________________________________________________________
When I see you, I close my eyes. When I hear you, I close my ears.
When you're near me, I run for life!!
___________________________________________________________________
Bitch= Babe In Total Control of Herself
___________________________________________________________________
If I die or go somewhere far,I would write your name on every star,so
the angels can look up and see,just how much you mean to me...
___________________________________________________________________
When U feel lonely, CHEER UP! just go to mirror & say,SHIT I'M
REALLY SO CUTE! U'll overcome your sadness. But don't make it a
habit coz LIARS go to hell.
___________________________________________________________________
U'r sweet like Baileys,warm like Cognac,special like Champagne,different
like Cocktails,exotic like Malibu & u knock me out like Tequila!Thats
just d way it is!
___________________________________________________________________
A heart is not to play with. A heart is not a toy. But if you want
too break it. Just give it to a boy
___________________________________________________________________
Ur spcial2me. I dont wont anything bad2hapn2u. Want u2alwys be safe.
But i cant always be by u. So please be very careful
___________________________________________________________________
Ever wonder why a,b,c,d,e,f are used to define bh-size? a: almost
boobs, b: bearly there, c:can do d: damn good, e: enormous, f: fake!!
___________________________________________________________________
Why do cows look so depressed when being milked? Well if someone
woke you up early, rubbed your tits for 2 hours, you'd be pissed
off too!
___________________________________________________________________
hNJOH OS W,I 3SV37d 3W d73H Hurry up and Crack the code!!!! Turn
the mobile upside down!!
___________________________________________________________________
I am an invisible alien. I have transformed myself into your telephone,
and right now I'm having sex with your finger. And you like it,
cuz I can see you're smiling!
___________________________________________________________________
Craig David, Shaggy & Britney var i samme rom, så slapp
n a dem n bønne, da sa Craig David: "i'm walking away"
Shaggy:"it wasn't me" Britney:Oops i did it again
___________________________________________________________________
Forgive my eyes 4 admiring u!U stole my heart from the moment u
looked at me! Call me crazy,call me insane,but each time my heart
beats:it calls out u'r name...
___________________________________________________________________
Let's play a game, called hide and seek. I will hide and you will
seek. If you find me you can fuck me, but if you can't, I'm under
the bed...
___________________________________________________________________
What women think about sex? At age8 ignore it at18 experience it
at 28look 4it at 38 ask 4it at 48 beg 4it at 58 pay 4it at 68 pray
4it at 78 4get it!
___________________________________________________________________
Upgading your brain... searching.... searching... searching....
...sorry no brain found...
___________________________________________________________________
When everything around you brings you in tears, remember that someone
really cares! Lot of hugs from your best friend!
___________________________________________________________________
This msg can only be read by a SEXY person: ..............................
Try again.....................
Nothing? Sorry, i guess your just not SEXY.............................
HEY! dont force it, ugly!
___________________________________________________________________
When I see you, I close my eyes. When I hear you, I close my ears.
When you're near me, I run for life!
___________________________________________________________________
YOU ARE... 100% beautiful YOU ARE 100% lovely YOU ARE 100% sweet
YOU ARE 100% nice and YOU ARE 100% Stupid to believe these words!
___________________________________________________________________
Cuddle & kiss me if u really miss me.Tickle &tease me if
u wanna please me! Slowly undress me if u wanna impresse me.So why
don`t u wanna SEX me?
___________________________________________________________________
A man without a heart, can never fall in love. A man who never fall
in love, can never truly be alive! I hope that this man never will
be me!
___________________________________________________________________
Sinner: Forgive me father 4 i have sinned. I'm a maniac, i fantasize
bout wild sex, i watch porno & i luv 2 c others do it. Priest:
Is that you, (navnet til den som får meldingen)?
___________________________________________________________________
I love you, and miss you, I'm trying to kiss you!
___________________________________________________________________
Did you here about the dyslexic devil worshipper? He sold his soul
to santa.
___________________________________________________________________
There was a young man from Kent, Whose dick was incredibly bent.
To save himself trouble, he put it in double. So instead of coming
he went
___________________________________________________________________
Why do men get smarter during sex? Because they`re plugged into
a genious.
___________________________________________________________________
Why do men have a hole in their penis? So oxygen can get to their
brains.
___________________________________________________________________
Whenever u feel lonely, look up one a star. And rebember how good
friend u are, no matter there we are.
___________________________________________________________________
I`m in love with someone I haven`t even met yet..I`m also in love
with someone who doesn`t even think about me..
___________________________________________________________________
Why don`t blondes talk when having sex? - Their mothers told them
not to talk to strangers..
___________________________________________________________________
Mary held her little daughter twent minutes under water. Not for
joy and not for trouble, just to see the funny bubble!
___________________________________________________________________
We had joy we had fun we had love in the sun, but the love didn`t
last because the girl ran so fast..
___________________________________________________________________
No boy no sex, no sex no fun, no fun no children, no children no
parents, no parents no problem..
___________________________________________________________________
I have a dream. The dream is about you and me! I dream that we always
will be together. And I want that dream to last forever..
___________________________________________________________________
Sex is a game. Love is a name. Fuck the name and play the game.
Sex is evil, evil is sind. Sind is forgiven so sex is in.
___________________________________________________________________
Sex is like a gun: You aim, you shoot and run!
___________________________________________________________________
Love isen't easy, love isen't fair. I love you, but you don't care...
___________________________________________________________________
If you go to bed 9 hours before you have to wake up, and your wife
wants to have 2 hours of sex, how much sleep will you get? 8 hours
and 59 minutes. Who cares wath she wants ! ___________________________________________________________________
What does a blonde answer to the question "Are you sexually active?"
- "No, I just lie there." ___________________________________________________________________
Just want you to know your friendship means alot to me. If we were
on a sinking ship and there was only 1 Lifejacket left... I would
really fuckin miss u ___________________________________________________________________
7 days and 72 years old man told his penis: We were born together,
seen life together, had lot of fun together, then why did u die
before me?
___________________________________________________________________
Why doesn't Osama Bin Laden have sex with his five wives? Because
when they spread their legs he sees Bush
____________________________________________________________________
Sex is a game. Love is a name. Fuck the name and play the game.
Sex is evil, evil is sind. Sind is forgiven so sex is in.
____________________________________________________________________
«
Tilbake